One too many metal chairs to the head must have started Ric Flair seeing angels. He’s endorsing and campaigning with Republican presidential candidate and religious fanatic, Mike Huckabee. With God and Flair on his side, Huckabee should dominate Southern state primaries, where everyone believes in God and professional wrestling.
It is crucial that other Republicans counter this critical endorsement. Is there a more natural fit than Sergeant Slaughter and John McCain? Both have waged long, bitter foreign wars, McCain against the Vietnamese and Slaughter versus the Iron Sheik. Fred Thompson and The Undertaker share a comparable size, monotone, simplicity of approach, and lack of charisma. Mitt Romney, the well-heeled front runner, should immediately court his wrestling equivalent, the inestimable Hulk Hogan, who could then lead mild Mitt through Florida on a “Pythons for Change” campaign. Ron Paul can get the Sex Pistols; with those punks behind him, he doesn’t need wrestlers. And as for Rudy Giuliani, not even Macho Man Randy Savage off the top rope could rally his cause.
No matter what the media might tell us, Mr. Joe Six-pack doesn’t care who the NRA, UAW, or John Birch Society supports. But when Ric Flair howls, “Wooooooooo,” voters listen.
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